Everyone is hardwired to want a more successful life. Unfortunately, “wanting” isn’t enough to change anything. You might not know it, but there are some aspects of your habits that serve as obstacles of change. Start your change for the better by removing some of the following things in your life:
10) Pursuit of Perfection
That’s an odd… tip. But it’s true. Perfectionists create a lot of stress for themselves as striving for perfection is a major inhibitor to getting things accomplished.
Imagine wanting to publish a best selling novel. You’ll be so focused on editing and creating the perfect sentence that you’ll never be able to write the rest of the 50,000 words. Even if you finished a completed novel, you can’t spend an eternity editing. At some point, you’ll have to let your work go and send it off to a publisher.
Another example is see is software or games. After the initial release, you will always see patches, updates, or even new versions. Perfection shouldn’t be the end goal. Perfection is an ongoing process.
9) Need to Control Everything
Recognize that you can’t control everything around you. That’s not the same thing as giving up. You can do everything to plan a fun and exciting vacation but something out of your control can pop up.
You stumble on a great deal for an all-inclusive trip. The resort has great reviews and the timing of the deal coincides with the best times to go. Unfortunately, a pipe bursts and you lose water to your room. If you can find another, but more inconvenient, way to get water, just accept it and enjoy yourself as much as possible.
Pestering the staff won’t change how quickly the pipe is fixed.
8) Fixed Mindset
A successful life requires you to be flexible and adaptable to changing circumstances. Just like how you can’t control everything, you can’t expect everything to go your way. Mike Tyson said it best, “Everyone has a plan, till they get punched in the mouth.”
If your plan isn’t working, figure out the true obstacle (internal or external) and make adjustments.
7) Desire for Overnight Success
A successful life rarely happens overnight. An “overnight success” is overwhelmingly the result of years of years of hard work and dedication.
Game of Thrones author, George R.R. Martin had this to say about his famous series: “Most people were startled to find out there were books that preceded Game Of Thrones. I’m a case of working forty years to be an overnight success.”
6) Toxic People
It’s time to cut out some people in your life if they’re more about dragging you down instead of pushing or pulling you up. While having a friend that plays devil’s advocate or pointing out difficult to see challenges has tremendous value, there definitely is a point where a “friend” can go too far.
Surround yourself with people who help you grow or are willing to pick you up when you stumble, and drop those who expect you to fail.
We love being safe. Being safe and comfortable makes way more sense than being uncomfortable. Unfortunately, being comfortable can make you complacent. Be more willing to challenge yourself and create opportunities where you can become better by failing.
4) Living In the Past
Look, the past is over. Even if you were a high-school or college success, you’re a new you. Ernest Hemingway said it best, “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.”
You can learn from the past, of course, but don’t strive to recreate it.
In an experiment published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, individuals reported greater happiness if they used $40 (£30) to save time—such as by paying for chores to be done or paying for a moment of relaxation—rather than spending the money on material goods. Psychologists say stress over lack of time causes lower well-being and contributes to anxiety and insomnia.
This means a successful life isn’t always about having the most or best “stuff.” It’s about having the time to enjoy life.
Grudges are a total time and energy blackhole. It’s a negative emotion that can absolutely consume you and prevent you from achieving your successful life.
While the character of Inigo Montoya from the book and movie of the same name, Princess Bride, has a more famous quote, he has a more poignant quote at the end of the movie: “I have been in the revenge business so long; now that it’s over, I don’t know what to do with the rest of my life.”
1) Comparing Your Life to Others’ “Successful Life”
Create your own definition of a successful life. What someone else enjoys or flaunts might not be what you truly desire. An example of this is what you see on social media.
Social media users tend to post pictures of their most exciting moments, so that’s basically all you ever see. It’s a false representation of a person’s life.